I’m all about strategy, as you might have guessed since I’m a strategist, duh. I always believed that when you have the right strategy, broken up into the right plan, know what you’re supposed to be doing + how to do it, you’re set. Set up for success.
All you had to do was just start, get it done and you were on your way.
Now I think about it, “Just start”, “Just get it done”, makes me want to laugh.
Over the last 2 years in online business, I’ve realized that mindset is a HUGE deal and it can make or break your success, even if you have THE BEST strategy in place.
Even if you know exactly how to set everything up and you’re lacking that mindset element, it’s still not going to amount to much.
So what do I mean by mindset in this particular instance?
Mindset = how + what you think about yourself and your business.
So it turns out it’s actually REALLY important to work on your self talk when you’re an entrepreneur, because this mindset shit can really get the best of you, if you don’t pay attention (truly just recently discovered the effect of mindset on my progress.)
I’ve always been a person who bounces back fast after trauma or many of life’s hurdles, but only when I became an entrepreneur, I realized how strong a fight I’d have to put up, to deal with my mindset shit.
I also realized that I actually have A LOT of mindset shit to deal with.
Now that I’m setting my own prices, being my own boss, making my own decisions all the damn time, these little mindset blocks are popping up left and right.
The further I go, the more apparent it becomes that my biggest hurdle is actually my own mindset. Crazy.
Not the “what to do next in my business” or the “how to do things in my business”, it’s the constant narrative in my head that gets in the way the most. So I’m gonna give you a glimpse of that narrative, maybe you can relate?
Here are a couple of mindset loopholes that have held me back from stepping into my full blown potential:
- The belief that noone will be interested to hear what I have to say
- The belief that I am not an expert comparing to person A, B or C
- The belief that noone will ever want to buy from me (even though I was already making a full income from my business)
- The belief that I should charge less as I am not worth THAT price
- The belief that people will judge, laugh and point fingers at me when I show up in a real, authentic way. Or show up at all.
- The thought that I will lose all my clients if I don’t show up for them 24/7, and if I don’t prioritize them over my own life and family (seriously.)
- Thoughts that I will never again have as good a month as this month (financially), because it was a fluke
- Thoughts that I don’t deserve to earn this much (on a great month) and it’s probably a fluke
- The fear that I will go broke and never be able to repair the damage (yep.)
Now that is a lot of personal shit, but I know that so many entrepreneurs are going through this and have similar thoughts spinning around in their heads day in, day out. And you know what? It’s fucking exhausting.
The anxiety and the pressure that comes with these mindset mind fucks is often paralyzing.
It has stopped me in my tracks again and again, made me doubt myself and my skills, made me feel like absolute shit. It didn’t let me move forward with my business, I felt like it was actually keeping me back. I was stuck in a loop of negative self talk.
The inner bitch we all have, that criticizing, horrible voice that questions all your ideas and moves, goals and dreams – that’s something that I never realized I need to work on, until recently.
Why? Because I finally opened my eyes and saw that these mindset mind fucks have caused me to:
- Procrastinate like crazy
- Live in constant self doubt
- Have major anxiety around the future of my business
- Lose my mojo towards my business
- Think about going back to corporate
- Lower my prices, even though I didn’t want to
- Undercharge and over deliver to the point of resentment
- Keep myself in the shadows aka no visibility of me and my brand
- Fear launching my website because “website shame”
- Fear launching new services I was really excited about
- Fear building a tribe even though I REALLY wanted to
- Fear going on FB live even though I felt compelled to do it
- Fear just getting out there and be seen for ME and WHO I AM.
So how did I overcome ALL of this shit? I didn’t.
What I did was make a huge leap and started dealing it with it, one mind fucking thought at a time.
I got some support, joined a group coaching membership (which I honestly never thought I would) and started sharing and coming out with these limiting mofos that have been eating away at my soul for so long.
I had people listening and supporting me, sharing their own stories.
I got my husband on board and told him what I was dealing with, he was shocked to say the least.
He told me that to him, I’m the benchmark for major success and he listed all the things I kick ass at, all that he admires me for and how great I am.
That was very eye opening to hear from my best friend and love of my life, he was genuinely taken aback by my own negative self perception.
I started to journal (I would have NEVER ever thought I’d say this) and repeat affirmations.
Even when I didn’t believe them, still have trouble believing some, but I’m changing my own narrative. One day at a time, one mind fuck at a time.
The old, bitchy tape in my head has been replaced by a new one which I’m now consciously creating to serve me, not sabotage me.
Of course, I still struggle with so many of these limiting beliefs and mindset loopholes, but making the choice to take control of my self talk has been the first and biggest step to my transformation.
Now when I hear a negative thought or belief, I slay it in my head.
I tell it to shut the fuck up. I have a positive one to replace it with. It’s not easy and some days it still kicks my ass. But I’ve learnt that I have the power to control what and how I think.
I’ve learnt how powerful my thoughts and beliefs are and the kind of an impact they can have on my life and my business.
The biggest mistake I was making has now turned into my biggest aha moment. You really fucking are what you think. Thoughts become actions and actions become your life.
How do you deal with mindset challenges in your business? Do you have a way of combating negative self talk? How do you deal with your inner bitch? Share in the comments! Know someone who could benefit from reading this post? Please share it! <3
Much love + positive self talk!